A day to remember. Traffic holding its breath. Sky a tense diaphragm above the city. Red and blue lights flashing, sirens wailing in the mid-afternoon air. An overturned truck leaking ominous fumes, emergency crews hurriedly evacuating the area.
My heart pounded as I glanced at the dashboard clock. Each second ticking away; like an eternity, precious time slipping through my fingers.
Desperation fueled what happened next. Ignoring the barriers, I abandoned our car. Sprinted towards my son's elementary school; ignoring frantic shouts of STOP! Inside I found him, crouched in a corner, safe but terribly frightened. Gathering him up in my arms, we fled.The ground trembled, the sky roared, the world seemed to collapse behind us.
In the aftermath, as dust settled, chaos subsided, I marveled at how, in the midst of life altering moments, heroic action can overtake the darkest of circumstances.
Kim provides a line from Seamus Heaney's poem "Twice Shy" as inspiration for Prosery in the Pub.
I like how you build the tension in this one... fast-paced and strong. A great take on the prompt!
ReplyDeleteI love that you set the chaotic scene immediately, Helen, using the prompt lines, with the flashing red and blue light and wailing sirens, not forgetting the ‘overturned truck leaking ominous fumes’. The standalone two-sentence paragraph is a great way of speeding up time, while at the same time splitting the action.
ReplyDeleteThat was a chilling scene, and one that seems to happen in many places around the way... it is the right time to be a hero...
ReplyDeleteYou built the tension quickly drawing the reader deeper into the story. Sadly, many parents deal with situation in real life - Truedessa
ReplyDeleteWhen the 'mother bear' instinct takes over there's no holding back! I would do exactly the same as you depicted.
ReplyDeleteDearest Helen,
ReplyDeleteYou acted like a BRAVE Mom!
Hugs,
Mariette
What a story! I hope they made it home safe.🙏🏼
ReplyDelete